All Things Anne

These are old stories written by me when I was between 9 and 12. These are the original stories, minus the bad spelling (:lol:). There was one more I had written back then, but it’s so IMPOSSIBLY STUPID that I’m not going to put it here. (Besides, I don’t have the paper at the moment and don’t feel like going and finding it.) Laugh all you want!

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The Boy who Always Slept

Once there was a boy named Henry. Henry Carpenter, to be exact. He always slept. He slept at recess, playing ball, at the park, and even at dinner. His mom and dad got so tired of having a sleeping kid around, that they wanted to GET AWAY!!!

One day, Henry’s mom and dad were talking about their dreams, when Mr. Carpenter brought up Henry sleeping too much.
“Martha, what shall we do about Henry?” Joseph Carpenter asked.
“I don’t know, Joe. Maybe we should ask him about it,” Martha answered.

“Okay,” Joe said.

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So, Joseph asked Henry what they should do about Henry’s sleeping problem.
Henry just said sleepily, “I dunno.”
Joseph thought about it, and discussed it with Martha. Then he went to the store. He bought a small package, and went home.

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The next day, Joseph came up to Henry with the package. “Henry, here is an alarm clock. t will help you get up in the morning. Also, there is my invention, the ‘Alarm Aids’. Wear them all through the day, and they will buzz. After a while, you will get tired of these, and you will learn how to stay awake all day!” Said Dad.
“Thanks, Dad!” said Henry.

And he never went to sleep in the daytime again!

The Red Sea Monsters

Once there were two monsters. They lived in the Red Sea. Their names were: ‘Flunker’, and ‘Dunker’. We’ll call them ‘Flunn’ and ‘Dun’ for short.
Flunn lived on the North side, and Dun lived on the South side. They both wanted a friend. One day, they were each swimming to the other side, when they met in the middle. Flunn was so surprised, that she kicked Dun. Dun, on the other hand, was so surprised, that he hit Flunn! Soon they were fighting madly.
Flunn thought, “He is a Combely like me!”
Dun thought, “She is a Combely like me!”
But, they wouldn’t admit it, so each went to the Red Sea Queen.
Dun got there first, and he said, “Good Queen, I want a friend. I was crossing the Red Sea, and I found another Combely, and we started fighting cause we were so surprised. What shall I do now?”
The Queen said, “Use the Golden Rule: ‘Do unto others as you want them to do to you.’ It works! Also, take these two boxes and give one to who you want in the sea to be your friend. Open them, and take a big whiff. Then, go to the surface, and swim to shore.”
“Ok, thanks, Queen!”

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After Dun gave Flunn the box and went to the surface and got married! Let’s tune in on what they are saying:
“It’s so weird to think we once were fighting!” said Flunn.
“Yeah,” said Dun. “The Golden Rule worked! Thanks, Red Sea Queen!!”

Cowboy Days

September, 1998 (I was 11). There’s two versions of this, because I edited it in 2000 or 2001. This is the original.

Matt knew he was a dead man. He had robbed a bank and killed Sheriff Carl McCultney back in the town of Arebego. McCultney was supposed to be fast with a gun. McCultney was a tall man at six foot five, and an honest man. is word was a promise.
But now, crossing the parched desert on a pinto, Matt looked back at the cloud of dust. It was getting closer now; too close. The pinto loved to run, and had been cooped up for days. Spurring the big horse, he raced ahead.

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Behind him, the posse had an expert tracker and gunman, Juan José, a Mexican, and about a dozen tough, hard men from town. All had fast horses and all of the horses were in top condition.
The reason the posse had a tracker was because Matt could go through the canyon at Muldoon Pass and it was only rocks and lava. A man could pass with an unshod horse and not leave a mark, except a rock turned over, or maybe a scuff from other horses. Matt’s horse was unshod.

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Huey was running for his life now, “Durn Juan!” José was the fastest gunman in all of Texas besides Riley McCutcheon, John Rider, José Briton, and the Laredo Kid.

Should he go over at Muldoon Pass, or go straight? Matt decided to turn at Muldoon Pass. He would have a better chance of escaping. He cached the gold in the saddlebags under a pile of rocks and started to circle around behind the posse.

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“Now, which way would he go?” a Californian drawled.
“He would go over at Muldoon Pass, I reckon.” Juan said. He had a slim, pointed, arrow-like face. The trails had hardened his face into lines of worry for Mary, his girl friend.

Behind, who was that coming after them? José scowled. The lines of his face grew deeper. A girl! A girl in a posse might mean death! Drawing her horse to a halt, Juan saw it was Mary.
“Mary out here? She must be crazy!”
“Juan,” Mary said, “Can I ride with you? I can shoot. I also brought water, coffee, and jerky.”
“Wal, I reckon you can come along. You can cook.” Juan said. “Just stay back when there’s a shoot’n. You can shoot, just stay back.”

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Matt was behind them now. Any second, he could hold them up. Any minute now, only, he couldn’t dig up enough courage. He would be facing one of the fastest gunmen in Texas. Suddenly, he was thirsty. Thirsty for a drink of water from his own well, and from his own ranch house. Well, now or never. Minutes ticked by. He should do it now. Now!

“Hands up! Make one wrong move, you’re buzzard bait!” Matt yelled. He couldn’t see Juan, but he knew he was there.
Juan was in the front. He also heard Matt. Juan turned his horse and walked it to the back of the posse. Matt had the drop now, and Juan knew it. The only comfort was that he was fast.
Matt saw him coming. “Uh oh,” he thought. Something in him dropped a heavy weight on him.
“You done gave it, amigo, you done got it.” Juan’s voice rang loud in the stillness of the brassy desert.
Matt had the drop. He could kill Juan. Yet, Juan might be faster.
Juan drew.
Matt seemed to be moving in slow motion.
Juan fired.
Matt had just moved a little and Juan’s shot aimed for Matt’s heart, ended up in his side, going through a lung.
As he lay on the ground, Mary came and gave him a drink and bandaged his wounds.
Matt looked up. “I cached the gold and saddle bags under a pine of rocks over at Muldoon Pass…Don’t take me to town…Bury me out here…”

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The Californian called Mike said, “I guess we’d better bury him.”
Juan and the others buried Matt and made a grave marker reading:

Matt Huey
Ded Sept. 12, 1964
Kild with a drop on the possie.
by Juan José
He robbd a bank.
Let him rest.

Every one who rode this trail could read it. I’m sure other men have been buried here, but none with a marker.

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Juan, the posse, and Mary went back to town. Juan asked Mary to marry him.
Mary said, “yes.”
They had a big dance and went home. They gave the money to the bank. The town made Juan Sheriff.
As they pinned on the badge, he said, “I, as your Sheriff, will live up to what the town expects from me, for ‘you got to stand for something, or you’ll fall for anything.’ I will stand for what’s right.”

The Alien

Once there was an alien. He was purple, with purple antennas, and light-blue eyes. He thought himself as very handsome. He was so prideful, in fact, that he decided to go into space without a spacesuit on, to get into his planet’s Guinness Book of Records. So, he got into his spaceship, and was off. About three minutes later, he was in space. He prepared to go, leaving a note saying, “I’m going into space. Cooby.” He took some food and water, and stepped out of the airlock. Instantly, he was killed. The moral? Never be prideful or vain.

He learned his lesson well, didn’t he!

The Witch and the Wizard

A witch named “Core” (pronounced, ‘Cory’) and a wizard named “Chee”, lived together in a dark, damp, smelly cave. Chee had one side, cause he was a wizard, and Core had the other side, cause she was a witch. They were not very good friends, but Core let Chee board for 10 toads a month.
One day the witch and the wizard started putting spells on the townspeople’s crops and animals, and sometimes the people. The townspeople had a pastor, and the pastor called the prayer chain, and they prayed that the witch and the wizard would leave. Core and Chee just couldn’t stand all of the praying, and they got so frustrated that the townspeople weren’t being affected by their spells, that they shriveled up and died. All of the sick people in the town got better, and they all went to church to hear about Jesus the next Sunday.

And they all lived happily ever after.